Healing from trauma as a teen in residential treatment

What does real healing from trauma look like for a teen? In this episode of the Turning Winds podcast, you'll hear directly from an alumna who shares her personal journey from arriving guarded and disconnected to discovering trust, community, and a stronger sense of self.

She opens up about the challenges of treatment, the emotional growth she experienced, and how staff support, peer connection, and consistent therapeutic care helped her learn to process trauma and build lasting resilience.

Whether you're a parent exploring residential treatment for your teen, a clinician supporting youth with trauma, or someone seeking stories of hope, this conversation offers insight into what real change can look like.

Topics covered:

• Teen trauma and trust issues
• Emotional regulation in adolescents
• How residential treatment builds resilience
• What real leadership development looks like for teens
• Long-term outcomes for teens in therapeutic programs

More episodes: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2136513

To learn more about Turning Winds, visit turningwinds.com or call 800-845-1380.

Transcript

 This is what it sounds like when you find yourself, your community, and we're ready to take on the world, life is still gonna happen, but you now have a team that you can reach out to and that's important. Welcome to the Turning Winds Podcast. My name is Kevin Zundl. Turning Winds provides a critical level of support for teens and could benefit from much needed help clinically and academically.

Today I speak with an alumna, which visited campus is here with us to share some of her experience and her amazing positive outlook moving forward. I'm always curious what. Your experience was at turning wins and some of the changes you were able to observe in yourself along the way? I would definitely say at the beginning of my stay at turning wins, I was like a very closed off, quiet individual.

I didn't really associate with the group or staff or anything. I really struggled with trusting people just 'cause in my past it had been like. Definitely been something that I had trauma builds up with. And so I was like, okay, like I'm just coming into the middle of Montana. I don't really trust anybody.

I don't know anybody. I don't know any of these students and kids and it's, it was just a really scary experience just coming from halfway across country to a place that you just didn't know anything about. But I slowly got like around my first month, I would say, as my six month mark almost. I really started to see like staff and students, just the staff.

Most importantly, just. Be there for to listen and talk to you and like throughout time like trust was built and just like having the ability to have a staff or someone just sit and listen to you about a struggle that you were having that day or simply just be there through your highs and lows. It was definitely something that like allowed me to build a sense of trust that something that I didn't have when I was growing up, and so that definitely made it.

Making relationships here and things that you really need to heal that strong or heal things that you struggle with on a daily basis. And just building the relationship part. And I think that's something that is really strong here in like strong-willed with the students and the group and just the atmosphere here.

And that was definitely a big factor for me and getting better and my making my mental state better is just like knowing that I had people that were gonna be there for me through my eyes and low and the days that I was struggling and. For sure, like my number one is he would usually, like whenever I needed like to talk about something, he would just be like, okay, like cut.

Cut the bluff. Cut, cut the sod of you being okay and everything's fine. And a lot of therapists here, like Mel and Kim and Sean, I would say like they just. They just are willing to see right through your, you know what, most therapists, I would say, like before coming to Turning Winds would be like, oh, you're fine.

Okay then we're gonna leave it there. But no, they were like willing to like actually take the time to explore how you're actually feeling and what you're actually going through. And just that with the consistent like commitment to explore more and not just, it wasn't just a job to them, really had an impact on me and definitely had that foundation built up relationships here.

And that's something that. Really started my process out here. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that connection really is critical to making one feel included and having purpose, and it does take time. I think that's one of the things that makes turning wind strong is it's a little bit different to your point, than seeing a therapist once a week or something like that.

It's really people who are committed to each other and it's something that just by definition takes investment in the time for that. Just having a way to look at your own emotions and the way that you're dealing with things as well. That sometimes you are able to show up differently when you're better set up going into it.

That if we're feeling disconnected and isolated and maybe harboring some anger, that's a bad way to sh. Show up to an issue, a moment of conflict. But if you're more centered going into it, I think it allows you to deal with that conflict or that challenge in a better head. Yeah, for sure. A hundred percent.

Yeah. Sometimes just hoping like therapists that would just help you like almost remove the emotion at the time being and help you get across what you were trying to say or what you're actually going through and thinking it at a more logical way and. That has helped me process like a lot of struggles that I go through like on a daily basis or just maybe things that I struggled with in the past and just like even processing trauma from my childhood and stuff like that is definitely something that I learned like big here and that just helped me.

Like even outside of Turning Winds, when I am on my own now, being outside of it, it's just helps me. Look at things with like face value and just be like, okay, this is a situation. Sometimes you really do just have to remove the emotion from it, and I've learned like a lot. That is a big skill that I learned here and took away from that.

And yeah, it's definitely something that I use on a daily basis for sure. Yeah. One of the things that Carl mentioned on another podcast episode that sort of sticks with me and I try to keep in my back pocket, it's the difference between in conflict trying to be right versus trying to get it right. And I think that's something, at least with milestones that.

I'm much happier with myself and the way that I deal with potentially conflict with my boys when I know my purpose isn't to force my truth on them, but really figure out how do we make this a learning opportunity. But then I can think of very specific times where I was proud of myself for being there and dealing with the situation that way.

I don't know if there's any examples that. You can think of where you said, you know, normally I wouldn't have dealt with it in this way, but I was able to be my best self. I really, I saw myself doing it in the moment and I'm really proud of myself as a result. Yeah, I, I also think like the factor of, you mentioned like the parenting kind of aspect of things and I think that really does help with being here at Turning Lanes and being able to like, talk with the staff and stuff about your struggles and things that you're going through.

And just not having them like necessarily be like the parent in the situation and like them to just be there to listen and validate how you're feeling and what you're going through, and just come at it with a understanding and logical sense and not necessarily a parenting mode of what you did wrong.

And just outta fear what parents often do, just 'cause they're worried of their parents and that's their job. And so it just comes out of. Love. And sometimes as kids we just don't see that sometimes, and it can be hard to the parent and the kid to even have a, like a valuable conversation when it's much needed.

And so turning winds like really, that's really good for like when I'm like going through something or a student and you can just come at it as, okay, we're real. Just gotta figure this out as best as we can. And someone is willing to just listen to you and not just be that parent police feeling as a kid.

And I think that like really helps just to know that. And that really builds a foundation of, I don't know, like the, just that sense of like just being there to listen and validate how they feel. And then parents oftentimes like, will get better at that. And throughout my home visits I figured, like I, going back, my parents really did change with.

Just being there to sit down with me and listen to me and necessarily shut off that parent like mode for the moment and just be there to like validate. 'cause sometimes when I don't know, my parents in the past before without the turning with Cushing and just like through time with just communication and stuff like that got so much better.

But it was just the out of fear, parenting outta fear and worry. And kids don't really see like the, it's out of love and it's out of genuine care and they're just trying to like be there to like help you in that situation. But. To the kid, it can come off as, oh, you don't really care. You're not validating how I feel.

You're just screaming at me 'cause I did this or this. Or I didn't finish this homework assignment or I snuck out or did something really dumb. But I think that foundation is really emphasized here, just shutting off my parenting worrying mode and easy to like process things and yeah, that's a big thing for sure.

One of the other things that I really like in talking to other alumni with from turning wins is the just how to foster and grow leadership skills. It seems really intentional there. And the more time that you spend there, the more time that you were put in situations where you get to act as a leader.

Is that something that you felt at all while you were there? Yeah, for sure. I definitely found that there was times when I was in leadership and I was just going through a lot and. Just like mentally, I just needed to step away from leadership. And in those times I really found that, I really did learn that like being a leader didn't necessarily mean having a backpack on your back.

Like it really taught me that. I remember the day that I was sitting outside on the porch and Cliff came up to me and he was just like, you're, it was, I was leaving soon and I was just like, really? Just couldn't really deal with the. All the responsibilities of being in leadership. And so he is, okay, you're still a leader and everything, but we're just gonna have you step away from being in leadership.

And I remember being in tears and I was just really sad and I was like, oh my goodness, like I'm losing leadership. This is a really big deal for me and I consistently want to just be a leader. And then I think, I really think like with losing something you find like how much like that meant to you or whatever kind of thing, like.

When I lost leadership, it was through losing it that I found out like it really is like not the backpack that signifies that you're a leader in the group. Like I was still trying to have the group's best interest try, still trying to put forth, like meeting with girls on a daily basis without my backpack because it really taught me that like being a leader is not just signified by like here, like being in leadership, going through the lounge and getting the little incentives that you have with being a leader.

And they really taught me like the real values and the true like self character that you have with being a leader. And that is what I cared with being like in the real world when I left Turning wins. It's, it's a lot more than than that. And so I think that's cool that they consistently will check in with how you're doing or.

Even just if you're being a really good leader and they notice it and stuff and it's just cool to lose it. 'cause I see, I feel like everybody in leadership loses it at least once, and I think through that is when you're learning like how to truly be a leader and truly have integrity when nobody's watching and stuff like that.

Yeah, it's definitely something that taught me a lot about being a leader and. Consistently like putting forth effort to have that mindset with the group and yourself on a daily basis here. What would you say to other parents? I know there's a lot of parents who listen to this podcast who are trying to figure out the next best step for their family situation.

It's insight or perspective that can help them. I think with my family and just thinking about like where we came from, that it's not like just like the consistent like effort of my parents, like always putting forward. There's gonna be highs and lows during your stay here and. It's not gonna be smooth sailing.

Like even when you leave drain winds, it's, there's still gonna be rough patches and there's still gonna be, not everything's gonna be perfect. You're not gonna necessarily be quote unquote fixed. It's just not gonna be like a perfect everything, one thing's gonna fix everything. And. Sometimes I have that mindset.

I was like, oh look, I had a great family call. All the rest of mine from here on out are gonna be like the best family calls ever. Or I'm, I had a great therapy session with my family and now they're all gonna be great. And it's just not the case. There's still gonna be slip ups, you're still gonna have disagreements.

But at the end of the day, just like knowing that each other still has each other's like best interests in mind and just being able to take things for face value and just taking the. Perspective of like, we had a rough moment, but we, at the end of the day, we still love each other and we still are willing to like hear each other out and stuff like that, and put forth efforts, like hear each other out and just being heard and stuff like that.

Like it's just not gonna be smooth sailing and there's still gonna be up ups and downs and just like the, I don't know, the general idea of you're all still gonna be together at the end of the day and you all still have the best interest in mind for each other and it's just not gonna be perfect. Yeah.

Awesome. Is there anything else that maybe you wanted to get out there in the world? I would say like I really did think when, didn't really think of it much when I left turning wins, but I. I thought in the time of my stay turning winds, I would think, oh, this has gotta be the hardest thing ever.

Treatment is really difficult and stuff like that, but really I think life happens once you leave and treatment, like all the skills that you learn here really happens once you leave those doors or you finally leave the driveway of turning winds and that's when life happens. I'm not saying that turning winds isn't hard, it's definitely difficult to work on yourself every day, but just I think I really start to notice and incorporate those skills when I left.

A lot more. And it's definitely gonna have its own set of problems and struggles and it really isn't over. Once you leave turning away, it's like you're still gonna be working on yourself, you're still gonna have lows, you're still gonna have slipups. And it's just not having that all or nothing mindset that, oh, I messed up so now treatment didn't work, or now that whole year that I spent there was all for nothing.

And just like taking it for like you. It's just a slip up. You're gonna mess up. And I almost like telling myself that I'm gonna mess up again or not big mess up like in the past or something. Or if it was a big mess up, like it's not. That's not the end of my journey. That's not my testimony. That's not the end of everything.

I'm gonna mess up. But now I have the skills and everything that I learned here at Turning Wind to help me tackle this issue. Or I now have a team that I have that I can go back and rely on to reach out to. And I'm no longer alone. I've built a foundation, I've built relationships and. I can come back and they're only a phone call away.

And that's what I had after penguins. That's something that I didn't have before. And so that's what's gonna get you through and that's when life really like starts, starts for you. And so that's, yeah, that's a big thing. There's still gonna be a lot of mess-ups. And you're gonna have, yes, there's, you have issues in turning wins that feel like level 10 issues and they feel like they're like the worst.

But then when you get into the real world, there's like taxes and jobs and. All that stuff and that you have to stress about that feel like level tens too. And there it's just a different type of stress that, 'cause you experience them at turning Lens and then you go into the real world and then you experience your own.

They're just, they're both stressors, but they're just different. And they're just knowing that you have that support and you have people to reach out to, and you have those strategies that you now have learned and skilled that you have just like in your brain now. And that definitely helps just knowing that it's not gonna be perfect and.

Life is still gonna happen, but if you now have a team that you can reach out to, that's important. If her words inspire, hope for your situation. Understand that. Change is possible. Call Turning Wind at (800) 845-1380 to speak with someone who can help. Invite you also to listen to some of the other episodes available to you.

Parenting tips and expert perspectives. Plus, check out the wealth of resources available to you at turningwins.com.